My journey in search for God and my identity has been filled with joy, pain, confusion and stillness. I am currently studying 2 Peter, and have found so much encouragement and comfort in the pages of this wonderful book. It feels like a lifetime to find a place to stand on and be settled in my spirit, knowing that somehow I am at the right place, at least even if I am not moving forward. In the midst of feeling overwhelmed by all the uncertainties I have about my hopes and dreams, a friend of mine send me a video clip yesterday, that talks about not quitting, about not giving up on my dreams. The Lord works in mysterious ways. Some days back another friend send me a bible verse in Deut 33:25, which says that the “bolts of your gates will be iron and bronze, and your strength will equal your days.” I have been pondering on this verse not really understanding what the Lord wanted to speak to me about, and then this video clip came. I knew that the Lord was saying that no matter how hard the journey is, and how long it might look, the strength He gives me will equal my days. On days that I feel I am weak and defeated my strength will equal that weakness, something like “just enough strength I need for that day”. The bolts of my gates are made of iron and bronze, strong gates that no evil or no plan of the devil will kick down. I have no earthly certainty to hold me in tough times. I have no connections here on the earth that I know and am sure will help me reach my goals. I doubt myself, my abilities to accomplish what I see in my heart. But 2 Peter 1:19 comforts me, that says that I will do well to pay close attention to the word of God, as to a light that shines in the darkness, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in my heart. The only thing I hold on to is the word of God, is the love of God, and His faithfulness that I still struggle to understand and hold on to. I will keep paying attention to His word, I will keep studying His word, and I will pray that He gives me the strength to believe, even on tough days, knowing that my strength will equal the toughest days. Because at the end we were called to live by faith and not by sight.
Let’s keep running friends, let’s keep hoping and keep paying attention to His word, as certain as the sun rise, He will shine His light into our hearts and we will see what has been there all along.